When You Know You Need to Change—But Overthinking Stops You

You know something needs to change. Maybe it’s your job, your relationship with stress, or the way you talk to yourself at 3 a.m. You’ve read the books, made the lists, and had the conversations. Yet, every time you try to move forward, anxiety and overthinking seem to take over. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many high-achieving professionals find themselves caught in a loop: the desire to change activates anxiety, which then triggers self-doubt and paralysis. Understanding why this happens—and how to work with your nervous system rather than against it—is the key to real progress. Why Overthinking Happens When You Try to Change Change, even positive change, is registered by the brain as uncertainty. Your mind’s job is to protect you from risk, and your body’s stress response kicks in when you step into the unknown. That’s why you might find yourself cycling through “what ifs,” researching endlessly, or waiting for the “perfect time” to begin. Overthinking is your nervous system’s way of saying: “I don’t feel safe yet.” 3 Strategies to Move Beyond Anxiety and Overthinking 1. Ground the Body Before You Challenge the Mind You can’t outthink anxiety—you have to out- breathe it. Before making a big decision or taking a new action, pause and reconnect with your body. Try this short grounding sequence: Exhale longer than you inhale (e.g., in for 4, out for 6). Drop your shoulders and feel your feet on the floor. Name one thing you see, one thing you hear, and one thing you feel. This resets the stress response and signals safety to the brain so you can think clearly again. 2. Break Change Into Micro-Actions Big goals trigger big fear. When your brain can’t predict the outcome, it resists. Instead of forcing massive shifts, identify the next smallest action that moves you forward. Ask yourself: “What’s one small thing I can do today that my nervous system can say yes to?” Consistency—not intensity—creates sustainable change. 3. Rewrite the Story of ‘Readiness’ You don’t have to feel completely calm to move forward. Waiting for fear to disappear keeps you stuck. Instead, practice moving with your anxiety, not waiting for it to vanish. Tell yourself: “I can feel anxious and still take the next step.” This rewires your brain to pair action with courage instead of avoidance. Final Thought Change isn’t about forcing yourself to “get over it.” It’s about learning how to work with your emotions, not against them. When you slow down, regulate, and reframe, your nervous system begins to trust that it’s safe to grow, and that’s when real transformation begins.